Wednesday, October 20, 2004
I had this last Sunday off of work. I had gone on a retreat with some peeps from the church and got back early Sunday afternoon. In fact, I got back early enough that I could've still covered my usual shift, but whatevs. So instead I decided to go for a bike ride.
I'm riding around when I pass this old lady who looks at me kinda funny, which isn't all that unusual. People in LA always seem to be quite perplexed when they see someone on a bike. So I pass her and then go round the cul de sac and set a course to pass her again. I spot her. She spots me. She locks on and stops me in the middle of the street.
Old Lady: Young man. Do you want a shredder?
Me: ?????
At that point I started searching my brain for what a shredder was. For some reason the only things that came into my head were hedge trimmers and a mulcher. Even if that's not right, I thought, it is still probably some gardening thing that I don't need.
Me: No thanks. I rent and the land lord takes care of all that stuff.
Old Lady: Okay.
I then bike away. At the same time my brain starts to work again. She was probably talking about a paper shredder, which I don't really need, but it would be fun to have. I keep biking. Then a third thought hits me. She could've been offering me something more awesome then I could ever dream of. What if she was saying Shredder, not shredder? What if she was offering me a life size replica of MASTER SHREDDER?!?!?!?!
I may have just missed my one chance at true happiness.
I'm riding around when I pass this old lady who looks at me kinda funny, which isn't all that unusual. People in LA always seem to be quite perplexed when they see someone on a bike. So I pass her and then go round the cul de sac and set a course to pass her again. I spot her. She spots me. She locks on and stops me in the middle of the street.
Old Lady: Young man. Do you want a shredder?
Me: ?????
At that point I started searching my brain for what a shredder was. For some reason the only things that came into my head were hedge trimmers and a mulcher. Even if that's not right, I thought, it is still probably some gardening thing that I don't need.
Me: No thanks. I rent and the land lord takes care of all that stuff.
Old Lady: Okay.
I then bike away. At the same time my brain starts to work again. She was probably talking about a paper shredder, which I don't really need, but it would be fun to have. I keep biking. Then a third thought hits me. She could've been offering me something more awesome then I could ever dream of. What if she was saying Shredder, not shredder? What if she was offering me a life size replica of MASTER SHREDDER?!?!?!?!
I may have just missed my one chance at true happiness.
